The NBA: Where Gawd Awful Happens

Wow. If you managed to watch the entire Celtics/Cavs game last night without a) gouging your eyes out with a pen, the remote, or any other sharp or blunt object b) throwing said pen, remote, or sharp or blunt object through your TV or c) wondering why there was a WNBA game on instead of an NBA playoff game, well, good for you. That was really, REALLY tough to watch- like tough enough to ask this question: would you rather watch last night's game again or a WNBA game courtside? I know, of course you're going to take a repeat of last night's game, but still, it was bad enough to at least ask the question (we've been blogging here for how long now and STILL can't find anything worse than watching a WNBA game: the impossible quest continues).

So for the record, in case any of a-c happened to you while attempting to watch, it was a 76-72 Celtics victory. Yes, that's with four full quarters. 76-72. Every year I hope the Eastern Conference has left the Knicks/Heat 70-68 playoff battles of the 90's behind for good, and every year they throw up at least one of these. The Cavs shot 30% as a team. All we were missing from them for a full-fledged WNBA game were some set shots, 20-30 jump ball tie-ups on rebounds where two players go for a board but neither has the strength to rip it away from the other, and...what else am I missing here? Oh yeah, lesbians. Way too many "heteros" in the crowd last night. ANYWHO, Bronbron went 2-18 from the field with 10 turnovers. I expect this in the regular season but I never EVER thought Stern would allow this in the post-season. As bad as Cleveland is, and after last night's game there is no longer any doubt they're bad, I thought once the playoffs started Bronbron would get the "D-Wade 2006 Title Run" treatment from the refs where he could drive 1-on-5 all night and as long as he got near the rim he'd get calls all night long. Well it didn't happen, and you can credit the Celtics D for that.

Chuck Barkley made the comment in the post game (albeit about 77 times, but still) that all night the Cavs tried to set-up Bronbron at the top of the key and either a) run the pick and roll with a big man or b) let him go 1-on-5. Well the Celtics were ready for it each and every time. When they'd run the pick and roll, the C's would send two guys after Lebron and force him to give it up, sometimes sagging a third and fourth white shirt into the lanes. And if he tried to go 1-on-5, again, two guys there at all times, with Celtics three, four, and five not far behind. Barkley also made the point that the one time, late in the game, when they ran a pick-and-roll with Boobie Gibson, the Celtics again doubled Bronbron, leaving Gibson wide open. What happened? Gibson buried the 3! So what'd the Cavs do the next time down? To quote Sir Charles "THEY RUN IT WITH THE BIG MAN AGAIN! IDIOTS!" Thank you Charles.

Seriously, is it that hard to make adjustments? Can you not see after the first half that giving Lebron the ball 25 feet from the rim at the top of the key is not working? "The Best Studio Show In Sports", which is Inside the NBA, had some other nuggets as well. Chris Webber pointed out that teams like the Lakers get Kobe the ball in the post or at the elbow where he has a chance to create and NOT go 1-on-5. They get him the ball more in his comfort zone where he can be much more effective. The Cavs? Yeah not so much. This then lends to a point Kenny Smith made. It's one he's claimed he's made in the past, but since I so rarely get to watch this show living here, it's the first time I'd heard it: In games decided by 7 points or more, it's the players. In games decided by 7 points or less, it's tactical errors (i.e. coaching) that decide the game.

GREAT POINT KENNY! Chuck and CWebb all agreed, and the three of them basically pinned this on Cavs coach Mike Brown without actually saying it, and I couldn't agree with them more. Now, it certainly doesn't help that Bronbron's teammates are just awful. The obvious strategy here will be to force Lebron to give the ball up, because as they proved last night, they don't have a consistent second or third scoring option to kill you, shooting 4-18 from threes last night. Actually, they DO have a decent secondary scoring option in the "Big Z", but Z's only effective 8 feet from the hoop and in, and it takes 6 weeks for him to make a move down there. The one guy they have who can help Lebron hurts him because his style is completely different. These are things you'd think would have been obvious to GM Danny Ferry when they gave Big Z that huge extension a few years back, but hey, they won't have to worry about this chemistry issue in 2 years when Lebron's playing in Brooklyn.

So the obvious strategy for game 2 then is to run pick and rolls with a guard setting the screen, making the Celtics decide whether they should double Lebron and leave a Boobie Gibson (2-6 FG's last night, 44% from 3 this season), Wally World (5-14 FG, 41% 3 this year. And by the way, Wally last night was doing what Wally always should have done in Minnesota. Shoot the damn ball when he's open. That's it. He didn't take more than a dribble or two without giving it up or having some idea where he was going. And the shots he missed were generally open looks. This is what Wally is and always should have been: a third or fourth option spot-up jump shooter) or Delonte West (2-10 FG, 35% 3's this year). The answer to me is STILL to double Lebron and have somebody else (i.e. whoever's guarding Ben Wallace or Joe Smith- two COMPLETE non-factors offensively) rotate over to get a hand in the shooter's face. You CANNOT allow Lebron to go to work 1-on-1, and I'd be shocked if the Celtics allow it to happen. Even if you're leaving some Cavs guards open for 3's, I'd much rather take my chances with those than Bronbron driving, scoring, and racking up fouls on you.

Further screwing the Cavs is that Kevin Garnett is going to absolutely, positively destroy them all series. Last night's 28 point barrage is just the beginning for him (did you also notice he took a HUGE crunch time shot last night and made it?). He not only can score at will over Ben Wallace or Joe Smith, but neither of those guys are going to make KG work AT ALL the other end. Garnett, who is at his best defensively as an off-the-ball defender, can roam like a free safety all series helping on Bronbron or the open wing shooter because Wallace and Smith don't need to be guarded. The two played a combined 47 minutes at power forward last night. The combined totals? 2-6 FG, Wallace hit 2 FT's (a total fluke), with 12 boards, 3 assists, 2 blocks, and 3 turnovers. 2-6 FG's? In 47 minutes? That's the most telling stat of all last night, and there's absolutely nothing Cleveland can do. A Ben Wallace or Joe Smith are fine if you have four or five others around them who can score. Well the Cavs have one guy who can do that, and the other, The Big Z, needs a football field of room to have space to make his moves. Unfortunately having Wallace or Smith clear out to give Big Z room isn't an option either because, again, the further away from the basket they get, the more useless they are on that end.

I know Cavs fans are going to say "well our best player shot 2-18 and got no calls all night, and we STILL had a chance to win!" To which I say, "while Lebron will have better games, so too will Paul Pierce and Ray Allen, which means the outcomes will still come down to what it did tonight: Cleveland has no answer for Garnett, no secondary scoring options, and in a close game, I like Boston's chances better than yours." Pierce and Ray-Ray will not combine for 4 points again, and unless Lebron starts going for 50 a night, which unless we get a "D-Wade against Dallas"-level performance from the refs will be impossible against Boston, I just don't see how Cleveland wins here. It's a testament to just how amazing Lebron is that the Cavs have even gotten this far, but it's as far as they're going. Boston wins game 2, the Cavs take game 3, and the C's rap it up in 5. Just in case we get 4 more stinkers like last night, I thought I'd save you the agony of having to sit through it. You're welcome.